I’m starting to notice a recurring theme coinciding with the start of a fresh week. Last week, Monday brought with it a ravenous beast that decided to take up residence in my belly, and today it was more of the same. Whaaaaaaat is going on? I mean, I know my weekends have been getting slightly crazier, but what the eff? Someone please explain to me how I can basically eat all day without even making a dent in my hunger? Okay, maybe that’s not entirely accurate – I’m doing okay right now so I guess I’ve managed to make a slight dent after hammering away at it all afternoon, but I’m not expecting this satisfied state to last very long. Heck, I’m already starting to fantasize about dinner…
Sooooo, because food is pretty much the only thing I can think about right now, I thought it’d be fun to introduce you to some of the things that have been keeping me alive for the past little while [read: what I’ve been reading(??) eating]. Try not to scoff at the lack of vegetables and overabundance of breakfast/snack foods – I tried to be a grown up and eat more normal foods, but my body just wasn’t having it. Ironically, the healthier my diet became, the unhealthier I felt. The more veggies I ate, the more stomach problems I encountered. The more whole grains I cooked, the more lethargic I felt. The less junk food I enjoyed, the sadder I became.
True story.
It’s an unpopular thing to admit in today’s chia seed obsessed world, but the less wholesome my diet became, the more wholesome I felt. Does that even make sense? Not really. The point is, I feel really good. My diet is nowhere near perfect, but it works perfectly for me – maybe big bowls of quinoa and roasted veggies rock your socks off, but they pretty much just leave me rocking back and forth in pain. Enough chit chat. I’ve rambled long enough, and just like I predicted, the belly beast is beginning to make itself known. On with the show food [so that I can go eat]!
. – . – . – .
Greek yogurt…
Bananas…
Cereal…
Almond Butter…
Homemade applesauce…
Spelt wraps…
Toast…
Select veggies…
Baked chicken…
Pizza…
Waffles…
Watermelon…
Dried fruit…
Random snacks…
. – . – . – .
So there you have it. Truth be told, I struggled for quite some time with trying to find my place in the healthy living community. The majority of my meals come in boxes (oh hey cereal, waffles, and pizza!), I don’t go out of my way to eat any sort of superfoods or voodoo powders, and if we’re being completely open with each other, I can’t even remember the last time I turned on my stove – I wonder if it still works…
BUT! while my diet may not be as ‘healthy’ as it once was, my mind is infinitely better. I may eat too much sugar and not enough veggies, but you know what? I feel better than ever. And the more I think about, the more I figure that my inability to fit in with the rest of the community is exactly how I fit in – after all, someone has to show that you can be perfectly healthy without conforming to diet and exercise extremes, right? Right 😀
. – . – . – .
Have you ever experienced the opposite effect when you tried something that was supposed to make you healthier? Veggies = pain, and drinking warm lemon water first thing in the morning gives me heart burn for the rest of the day.
Awesome post! And I hate to respond to your deep words with a totally trite question, but I’ve GOTTA ask–what kind of almond butter is that?? It looks so perfect! 🙂
It’s Maisie Jane’s crunchy AB, my absolute favorite 🙂
http://www.maisiejanes.com
Your food/pantry staples look like an exact replica of mine almost. I especially love that “select” veggies picture, too funny. As of this moment I have exactly zero vegetables in my house right now.
Woops I lied. Just remembered I have a sweet potato kickin’ around somewhere. But anyway, I love your approach to food. You have to eat what works for you and you alone. If you feel great, that’s all that matters. And I think you fit in perfectly with my little corner of the blog world!
healthy is completely subjective, which is something i found out the hard way after buying into several health phenomenons i saw on the web.. flax seeds have no place in my stomach and neither does kale. they may give me boosts of vitamins and minerals, but they also gave me boosts of nausea. your unhealthy food is pretty healthy anyway, even more so because it aids your healthy mindset.
p.s i’m the fifteen year old that commented on your post a while ago, thank you for your input on not calorie counting!
Kale has no place in my stomach either, but mostly because I think it’s kind of gross 😆 I hope you’re doing well, Daisy!
agreed, it isn’t nice raw or cooked which really is saying something! i ever tried shoving it into my juicer to use some purely because i’d bought a tonne and didn’t want to waste it.. liquid version is just as bad. thanks 🙂 i guess i’d be lying if i said i’d changed drastically but i’m attempting to.
I love this post! There is no one way of eating that works for everyone and clearly you have figured this out! I love the focus on not eating foods you consider “perfect” but rather foods that make you feel “perfect”. Such a great example of true healthy living!
Its awesome that you’ve been able to really figure all this out. Well, awesome and weird at the same time. lol Its amazing how some food can be viewed as nutritious gold for some, but then for you its like damning you to a day with tummy pain. SO strange! All I know, is that ours bodies are smart and will tell us right from wron, all we have to do is listen! Im glad you’ve been able to do that and really narrow down foods you can’t handle. Your a superstar 🙂
Its quite interesting that there seems to have been almost a backlash against ‘ultra’ healthy eating within the HLB community. Personally I stick by what I’ve always believed – different things work for different people, all we can do is strive to find a balance that works for us as individuals. I know that when I was eating higher raw vegan last year I actually felt great for a while, but then that changed and now I’m here eating meat and dairy and feeling pretty good again. I think the problem for me is when people are bad to feel bad for the way they eat, whether that’s ‘too’ healthy or not healthy enough, it drives me crazy!
I’ve definitely noticed that backlash as well, and I think a lot of it has to do with people trying to adhere to diets that their bodies don’t like and then feeling guilty for not being able to stick to them. That guilt is unwarranted though, because like you said, we should all do what works for us individually.
Ah the chia seed world comment cracked me up! We all need different things and different types of meals work better for different people. This foodie world would be boring if we all ate the same things and food companies would be out of business! Your diet looks pretty complete and well rounded to me! That pizza looks heavenly!
Hahaha I totally cracked up at “voodoo powders”. I totally agree with you there. I’ll get my protein and greens from real food, thanks, not weird powders that cost an arm and a leg.
And I love that you eat what YOU want instead of getting sucked into the blog world trends. It took me a while to become okay with that too. I don’t eat protein pancakes and green smoothies, and I sometimes eat white bread and ice cream. But you know what? That’s okay. Heck, it’s NORMAL!
As much as I love healthy, whole foods, I hate the quinoa and I have no interest in goji berries. I also recently introduced icecream/chocolate as a daily thing. As it turns out, not freaking out about everything entering my body makes me feel so much better, and happier!
Can I also say that lots of these fears, and a more carefree approach, came to me thanks to your inspirational posts? Love you girlie!
Have a great one!
This is why I love your blog! Like you, I am not an obsessively healthy eater. I eat ‘junk food’ every single day. I eat a lot of packaged foods and a white cinnamon raisin bagel with cream cheese fills me up better than a bowl of oats with fruit and nuts. Maybe because the bagels what I’m really craving. I have stopped reading the obsessive blogs because they are just not how I ever want to live again. Thanks for being real! You are an inspiration!
I understand where you’re coming from with a lot of this – due to some health issues I’ve had to do a complete 180 on my diet in the past few months. I was THE volume eater. Until my GI system decided to totally pack up and die. Now I’m very lucky if I even get the ‘5-a’Day’. My only protein comes from peanut flour really – other than that it’s all WHITE rice, GF pasta and bread, bananas, applesauce. I’m really struggling with fats because I can’t find a single one that doesn’t make me ill (avocadoes and nut butters even in small quantities = nope). So I’m just telling myself that I’m like a Kenyan runner with their diet of something like 80% carbs…
Honestly there are two blogs I’ve read recently where I swear the authors are almost taking the…anyway, I think it’s disordered and not healthy to eat pounds of raw broccoli, kale, Brussels Sprouts all doused in garlic hummus mixed with water or whatever. I’d eat loads of roasted veggies and a whole squash by myself and now I’m paying for it. I know there’s ‘each to their own’ but really I think eating ten times’ the RDA of fibre is part of an eating disorder for most – eating for hours for very few calories. I swear the human body was not designed to eat the diet of a Yak.
xxx
i think if you can read the ingredients on a box, then your fine. Boxes are cheaper and a girls gotta eat. We’ve lived off rice and eggs and salsa for a good few months before. I bought carrots as our only vegetable and bananas as our only fruit. Felt good, kept us satisfied, and we saved money. One thing i’ve learned over the years is that when your stomach goes through a lot of distress, either will illness, surgery, malnutrition, etc. It can’t handle digesting those raw foods for a while anyway. So pour the cereal, pass me the almond butter, and toast my waffle please.
Yes ma’am! 😉
The awesome part about the Healthy Living Blog community is that something different works for everyone! For me, I start feeling too overwhelmed by sweetness if I have too many cereal/yogurt bowls, but I could probably down veggies by the plateful, and still feel great. It’s all about testing the waters and finding out what floats your boat 😀
Love your honesty and opinions on every post you share with us. I think it’s so important to listen to what YOUR body craves, not what the rest of the society tells you to crave. No one is the same, and the fact that you nourish yours with foods that help you out, that to me is healthy. If you love cereal, and it doesn’t cause no harm on your stomach, than so be it & enjoy every bite girl 🙂
Great post! I do love veggies, but more than 1 or 2 servings at a meal does not give me a happy tummy. Salad is especially bad, and every time I try to eat oats I spend the rest of the day feeling sick. I’ve spent way too long trying to force these things, thinking that if I could only train my digestive system to take them I’d be healthier- and it didn’t work. The way of eating that makes me feel best is balanced meals (carb, protein, fat and fruit/veg) which are large enough to fill me up. I think that this is actually pretty close to considered healthy eating, even if it doesn’t fit with fads (palao etc.) or sensationalist magazine articles- it’s what my dietician told me in recovery, and it’s not far off the government guidelines (in the UK, anyway).
On the insatiable hunger thing- I’ve been feeling a bit that way too, and I’m glad I’m not alone! Maybe it’s a winter thing?
It definitely might be! I know a lot of people were mentioning that their appetites increase with the cold weather, so maybe it’s just that our bodies need more fuel to keep us warm at these times.
“The less wholesome my diet became, the more wholesome I felt”–> love this sentence and agree with it to an extent. Not to sound like a complete dork but eating healthily is kinda like “economies of scale”: after a certain point, each additional unit decreases the overall effect and starts to become unhealthy.
I love your style of eating especially as it resembles mine so much. I was just thinking how low my protein intake yesterday was and in the past, that would have bothered me. I am okay with it now- as long as my food tastes good and makes me feel good, that’s all that matters!
Oh and as much as I love broccoli, I’ve started to limit my intake because it doesn’t make my stomach feel so great!
Another healing post. This is good stuff. I feel like reading so many ‘healthy eating’ blogs has really had an unhealthy effect on me. This isn’t necessarily the fault of the bloggers, but I do have to admit that there is a build up around certain healthy ‘fads’ in the blogosphere that imho, are really just very well veiled eating disorders. Sorry, but I’m just speaking from my own experiences and observations. Luckily…there are bloggers like you that snap readers like me back to reality 🙂
This post makes me smile. Why? Because it makes me feel like I don’t have to pretend to be crazy about oatmeal, overnight oats, chia seeds, protein pancakes (made of nothing but eggs and bananas), mounds of salad with no dressing, and protein smoothies. I actually don’t care for any of those things much at all, even though the ED has made me force them down and try to pretend that I liked them just because they were what ‘healthy’ people with bodies I envied were eating. Truth is, I truly enjoy eating things like… bread (gasp!), pancakes with flour, eggs and syrup (WHAT?!), huge cereal bowls with milk (are you INSANE?!) and red meat meatloaf (gtfo!). Unfortunately I feel like at times the healthy living blogs have me feel as though I should be ashamed of those things, and that I shouldn’t have them. But as a I struggle towards recovery, I’m trying to unlearn all these lies. Because the truth is, all this ‘healthy living’ has really wreaked havoc on my body- as in, I can’t remember the last time it was this screwed up, which is exactly the opposite of what it was when I was eating what is commonly considered “unhealthy” (basically whatever the hell I wanted). Lately I’ve been putting two and two together to figure out that something isn’t gelling here, and I need to make a change. Maybe my body actually needed and still desperately needs those things that I’ve become afraid of eating now, and maybe, just maybe, it doesn’t need all these damn veggies all the damn time. Amazing post. Thanks 🙂
Jess
Oh the things I forced down in the name of health – I’m definitely feeling you on that one, girl. I look back at the way I used to eat before I got sick, and despite eating copious amounts of junk food, I honestly believe that I was healthier than I was when I tried to clean things up. I’m going to go out on a limb here and say that your body probably doesn’t like the veggies, chias, and smoothies, so don’t be afraid to enjoy bread, huge cereal bowls, real pancakes, and red meat. You might just find yourself feeling better than ever 🙂
(still holding you to the Thanksgiving day goals, btw 😉 )
I see you like your bananas just like I do…the more brown spots the better! I don’t know how people eat greenish bananas..yuck!
By the way, that pizza looks amazing…I now have the munchies 🙁 haha.
Haha, I actually had a DELICIOUS big bowl of quinoa last night, but I also had some even more delicious chocolate and it made me much happier than celery ever has. I have done my fair share of overdosing on gigantic, fat-free salads and they have only ever made me temporarily bloated and then hungry half an hour later.
And frankly, I can’t think of many people BETTER suited to the healthy living community than you are. You have found balance, acceptance and enjoyment of your diet and lifestyle, and that is definitely healthier than chia 🙂 By the way, I have a post about just that coming up tomorrow and I would love to hear your thoughts!
Look forward to reading it 🙂
Love it! I completely agree with you actually – once I started adding more processed carbs back in, I felt LOADS better. I do still eat a lot of quinoa and rice, but oats (feel your pain on that one!), and other grains like millet, farro, etc bother me. My diet is pretty much select fruits (clementines, grapes, berries, and bananas), potatos (sweet, yellow, and purple), select veggies (tomato, spinach, avocado…wow that’s it lol), select grains (quinoa and rice), and then….soy milk, popcorn, annie’s GF bunny grahams (i know you’re not gluten free but try the GF Snickerdoodle ones…you will LOVE them I think!), pop chips, pretzels etc. Yep. And I feel AWESOME so….I’m just gonna rock on. Glad you are too! 😀
Healthy definitely means different things to different people, and I think it can even just change over time. Like, during the worst of my ED and even into my recovery, I thought healthy meant eating things that were extremely low in saturated fat and having tiny portions. Now I’ve progressed to the point where I care more about the nutritional benefits (like fiber, vitamins, etc.) in food rather than the calorie content and I also care about the ingredients in my food a lot more. I’m not ashamed to buy packaged food but I set high standards for what kinds of ingredients I’m okay with putting into my body, and that’s what works for me. Now I feel so much less restricted, because I allow myself to enjoy fats like coconut and nuts and I enjoy dark chocolate and dried fruit on a daily basis, despite the OMGsomuchsugar! What feels healthiest for me now is eating foods that are pretty natural, getting a good balance of carbs/protein/fat and enjoying veggies along with chocolate every day.
lemon water does the same thing to me!! good for you for listening to your body and eating what makes it feel good. We are all so different, and our bodies all want different things!
Love this post and YOU KNOW I feel the same way girl. I don’t eat a ton of those big ass bowls of veggies because they make me feel bloated and uncomfortable and I’m glad someone else agrees. I go through tubs on tubs on tubs of Greek yogurt.
Haha I can actually go through tubs of yogurt so fast that it freaks me out sometimes. All I can say is thank goodness that I don’t have a sensitivity to dairy because I would probably starve if that was the case.
I think the reason you still may experience insatiable hunger on a relatively regular basis is that many of your go-to meals (like the frozen pizzas or ready mac and cheese, for example) contain the caloric value of a large-ish snack, in my opinion. A “meal” that is about 300 calories will not keep you full. Why? Because just like the snacks preceding it, it’s not really high in calories. And while we don’t have to have 3 huge, square meals, maybe adding a little more to your meals will help round out that hunger instead of eating essentially bits and pieces (snacks) all day. I used to think smaller meals (or lots of snacks) was the way to go too until I realized I was just left feeling hungry. every. 2. hours. ANNOYING. Once you eat a more substantial meal, you don’t feel the need to eat a snack an hour or two later.
I would never be able to get by with 300 calorie meals. Mine are triple that right now with additional snacks. I never believed I could eat so much but I think my metabolism sped uP as soon as I started eating more!
All those foods look pretty damn healthy to me! Health is subjective – it’s about what works best for your body, something you seem to have found. I’ve never tried making homemade applesauce – I should give it a shot sometime! Bananas and Greek yogurt are daily musts for me too.
God, I love this blog. Your words and point of view is so refreshing! All those foods look EXACTLY like what I’ve been eating. I swear, without bananas, greek yogurt, nutbutter, baked chicken, and eggs, I would starve.
PS, your photography is beautiful. What kind of camera do you use?
Thanks girl! I use a Canon EOS 7D.
LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE THIS!!!!! You know me and my love affair with all things dried fruit 😉 In fact, I’m currently drying some pineapple on my dehydrator– come on over and party!
Everything about this post rocked Amanda. I especially loved the very last part regarding sugar vs. veggies and the status quo “healthy” diet. I’m right there with ya– I never felt as mentally whole when I was trying to live up to society’s standards of the perfect low sugar, high fiber, low carb, low fat diets. Looking back, I honestly don’t even know how I functioned, I mean, a girl’s gotta have her apples and peanut butter! 😀 I kinda regret the time I wasted on trying to be perfect, but then again, it led me to where I am today, and I wouldn’t trade that for anything! 🙂
Have an awesome evening my friend <3
I’d take you up on your party offer in a heartbeat, but I’m allergic to pineapple! I know you’ve got bananas, though, so I’ll be over in 2.2 😉
I think we are the same person. I too live mostly out of boxes and don’t construct these crazy meals. Yes I can roast some veggies but I don’t have the time or patience to really cook. But guess what, I actually feel better than I have in a long time. Lately though I have been like you, I have a hunger that just can not be quelled. I mean what is going on? It drives me just mad!
Love your honesty, as always. I think it makes perfect sense, really – if you’re focused on eating “perfectly” allll the time, you’re going to be miserable. Having freedom and listening to your true cravings is so much more natural. Personally, I experienced a bit of a rebellion to my disordered behavior when I got the courage to eat outside my comfort zone, and gradually I’m finding a bit more of a balance. I’m eating what I really WANT and not worrying so much about the nutritional profile – there’s a place for brussels sprouts AND dark chocolate! It’s still a work in progress (isn’t it always…) but it’s starting to feel a bit more intuitive and less like a battle.
This really reminds me of an episode of ‘Meet the Amish’ I watched a few weeks back (don’t judge, I love that show!). One of the English people asked the Amish man if eating healthily was important in his amish society, for which he answered that it was, but it made up only one third of him. To live a long life you have to not only nourish your body, but also your mind and soul.
This really resonated with me, because for ages I thought that if I ate the perfect diet and had the perfect body, I would be so happy, never get sick and live forever. I neglected my mind and my soul, which has had dire implications in my life now, and left me with continuous depression.
Now that eating healthily isn’t central in my life, I am trying to open my heart out to others and the world, in order to make up for the damage I have done.
That Amish man sure put everything into perspective for me. Maybe I’ll go and be Amish…..
I think we all eat more that way then people admit (or at least that is what I tell myself when I read people’s ‘clean earring’ posts. Much of what I eat comes from a box or plastic wrapper too and I’m fine with that!
Sometimes I wonder if it’s all just a facade, but if it is then I wish people would realize that it can actually do a lot more harm than good. I mean, sure it’s great to inspire people to adopt healthier habits, but more often than not it just leads to an obsession with eating 100% clean, which introduces a whole host of other problems.
Awesome post Amanda!! They always bring a smile to my face – because you are so REAL!! I love how you are not afraid to be who you truly as – not trying to fit the “healthy” mold! I personally think your diet is perfect – if you feel good so be it! By the way I eat almost all of the same food you do each and every day!
🙂
You’ve probably already read my AAHHHHHhhhh text. haha.
Seriously though — it’s like you took my daily menu and wrote it on your page. Except you’re missing the eggs. I eat a lot of eggs. And sub fish for chicken. But honestly — I feel like my body just runs better on the “insta-carbs” that cereal and bananas give me. I tried the high-protein thing (couldn’t concentrate at all) and the higher-fat thing (and I felt SUPER sluggish). Breakfast twice a day, greek yogurt, bananas, apples, fish, eggs, and simple veggies are totally what I’m rocking these days and I FEEL FABULOUS!! I think it’s all about finding what works for your body. It will let you know when it’s out of balance. 😉
I finally learned to just eat what I like. I like you got caught up in the “healthy blog” stigma and worried if others would think my food choices weren’t healthy or clean enough but after growing up not eating 100% clean and not be dead or have any sort of illness I think I will make it.
I need to eat a diet that fits me, not the mild of what others think i should eat. So yes I put jam on almost everything and no it’s not sugar free.
*mold
So I didn’t think that you could be any more awesome… and then I read this post. Amen sista. The way I feel after eating a cookies and cream ice cream drumstick while watching a movie on the couch (aka me every night this week) makes me feel better than any time I’ve eaten a big plate of veggies (which a lot of times makes my stomach hurt). Healthy does not have one definition and the way our bodies respond to things is so individualized.
“You do you.” Find out what works for you and stick to it. You’re eating for yourself, no one else.
Personally, I’m still experimenting. I wish I could eat watermelon like you, but it gives me an instant stomach ache.
Love it lady….love your honesty and openness and celebration of who you are…you’re kind of my role model right now can’t lie…although I have to agree with Matt…that stuff looks pretty damn healthy to me! And it all makes up a part of my diet, too…hoping that those last few will grow to make a larger part, too, as I get more comfortable with where I am now…and you give me a ton of hope that I can get there, so thank you 🙂
You can definitely get there, hun, it just takes time 🙂 It definitely wasn’t an overnight thing for me, and I still feel like I’m constantly making progress.
I’m starting to think that’s life haha…one bit of progress after another…at least it’s not boring…and we always keep growing if we let ourselves right?
Well said, Amanda! Thanks for yet another post proving it’s okay to be just the way you are and get against the tide. Reading way too many healthy living blogs (yes, guilty here) it’s hard for me not to feel bad about my seemingly inperfect way of eating. Following your posts, however, leaves me feeling better.
Hmmm … I think the one thing that I expected to make me feel healthier was cutting out carbs and eating more protein because “everybody did it”. Well, I didn’t do that for too long: Lack of energy as well as constant hunger pangs ensued and let’s not even talk about my mood. Same goes for lowering the amount of fat in my diet or eating at certain times only. Stupid to the max. I don’t ever want to live that way again.
Oh girl I can’t do the low-carb thing either. My energy and mood plummet hardcore, and it’s too hard to continuously say no to all of my favorite foods.
Everything there looks pretty healthy to me!
Healthy is a term that is different for everyone. I know I feel the best eating REAL food, which includes dairy, meat, and all of that. You just have to find what works for you.
I find it funny that I’m allergic to some very natural foods – like soy, almonds, raw carrots. Almonds make my mouth all itchy, as do carrots, and soy makes me sleepy. Not so good.
I also am amazed by people who drink milk, which I know is full of vitamins and minerals, but boy does it rip my stomach apart.
Well I’m allergic to peanuts, which are another very natural food, and soy doesn’t make me feel too good so I try to avoid it.