I promised myself that I wasn’t going to go all saptastic on you guys, but dangit… there’s just no way I’d be able to start on today’s post without thanking you for all of the e-mails and comments you left on my last one. Not gonna lie – it’s never easy to make yourself vulnerable by opening up that way. I mean, who really wants to admit that they’re not exactly where they thought they’d be at any given point in life? But, as always, the outpouring of support was incredible. Seriously. If you’re struggling with feelings of drifting along with no purpose, go read over some of the comments that other people left – you may just find comfort in the fact that you’re definitely not alone.
And I know I said I didn’t really have any advice to give on the whole limbo situation, but there is one small thing I’d like to recommend you do…
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Don’t spend time looking back at all the time you think you wasted, because doing so is only wasting more time. As cliche as it sounds, you really can’t move forward if you’re constantly looking back. You may not be exactly where you want to be right now, but that doesn’t mean that you’ll never get there. The beautiful thing about life is that, as long as you’re alive, nothing is set in stone. It’s never too late to make some changes and start on something new.
And stop comparing yourself to others!
We’re all on a different journey, and I know for a fact that I’m generally content with where I’m at until I start comparing myself to other people. Oh, she’s happily married; she’s expecting a baby; she’s got tonnes of friends; she’s starting an exciting new career; and I’m… well… here. Yes, here. And, honestly, here isn’t all that bad of a bad place to be – I have more than enough to be thankful for and plenty to look forward to. Everybody does. Life can change in the blink of an eye without us even planning it, so really, there’s nothing to get upset about. And I promise to keep reminding myself of that if you do too.
And another thing I want to remind you guys of is to cut comparison out of other aspects of your life as well. As you probably know, today is What I Ate Wednesday…
… and as much as I love sharing my eats and getting inspired by the eats of others, I’m also well aware of the fact that it opens the door for some nasty comparison.
I’m sure we’ve all done it before – compared our meals to somebody else’s. We see someone with a body that we admire or hear about a diet plan that promises all sorts of benefits and instantly feel like we should be following suit.
Oh, she’s not eating carbs after breakfast… I shouldn’t do that either.
Oh, she’s cutting back on sugar… I should cut back too.
Oh, she lost a lot of weight going Paleo… I should try that as well.
Sound familiar? No shame, I’m guilty of it myself. And while I’m all for experimenting with your diet and trying out new things, I can’t stress enough how important it is to be able to admit to yourself when those things aren’t working for you. Too often we get sucked into believing that what we’re doing is good for us, when the opposite is in fact true. I’ve fallen victim to countless “bad ideas,” only to rationalize them by telling myself that it worked for so-and-so, so it must be good! But now, after a good deal of trial and error, I think I’ve finally found a way of eating that works for me.
It’s alternating between cereal and oatmeal for breakfast…
Eggy bananafied oats topped with plain Greek yogurt, honey, and almond butter.
It’s eating my body weight in fruit…
Fresh cherries and blueberries (finally!!!!).
It’s satisfying those cookie cravings…
Freshly baked chocolate chip oatmeal cookies.
It’s enjoying my daily coffee…
Dry cappuccino from Starbucks.
It’s snacking on healthier versions of childhood favorites…
Ketchup flavored Popchips.
It’s having breakfast for dinner at least twice a week…
Cereal soup… Plain Greek yogurt mixed with a banana, homemade applesauce, and Kashi Cinnamon Harvest, and then topped with almond butter and almond milk.
It’s making sure to end each day on a good [read: sweet] note…
Vanilla ice cream and a couple of mock Oreos.
It’s all about me, and doing what works… even if that means my eats sometimes resemble those of a 5 year-old.
Happy Wednesday, friends!
. – . – . – .
Do you ever struggle with comparing your eats to the eats of others?
What’s one thing you know works for you?
What’s your favorite flavor of chip?
“There’s no shame in eating like a five year old,” say the girl who is literally eating some granola, yogurt and fresh raspberries as I type this.
I’ve been caught in the comparison trap recently, although not in your typical I feel bad about myself because I don’t eat like them way. More like, I don’t eat like they eat (where is the bread, the actual peanut butter (what in the heck is PB2?!), the cheese, the egg yolks, the salad dressing!) so maybe I don’t belong here which means I’m sorta back to being adrift and alone again. Although blogs like yours and comments like yours really help.
I love salt and vinegar chips, but if I was in Canada, I’d be putting down the Ketchup and Dill Pickle chips like crazy.
I’ve actually been noticing more and more bloggers leaning towards a more normal way of eating. Maybe it’s just because I choose to stop reading the bloggers that only eat egg whites, chicken, and salads, but I’ve been seeing more egg yolks, bread, cheese, and real nut butter lately. There’s still hope!
I like hope. It’s a good thing.
Thats right girl! – It’s all about you! Whether we eat like 5 year olds of 80 year olds we just need to eat what works for us 🙂
I definitely catch myself comparing foods with others every now and then and I always have to remind myself that everyone is different. And also the fact that people are not posting everything they are eating because I know I certainly don’t take a photo of everything I eat.
And I neeeeed those ketchup pop chips in my life. Like today.
I def find myself every so often struggling with the comparison trap with others foods. But since i have been that girl who ate only veggies and green juices daily never had a sweet treat and swore off peanut butter, I know I dont want to ever be that. So I may feel bad while everyone is posting pics of there salads as I am on my 3rd donut of the day, I get over it and know it’s food and it doesnt run my life. If i myself feel crappy for eating junk for a few days I eat healthier the next few days, simple as that. Ketchup popchips, holy cow. I am honestly going to the stores to search for them tomorrow.
‘Fraid you’re going to have to come all the way to Canada 😕 They’re a Canadian exclusive.
Oh yes, I definitely compare myself to others when reading blogs – it’s almost impossible not to! I mean, I’m pretty comfortable with how I eat, but I still fall into the comparison trap. Sugar free, no dairy, vegan, paleo, gluten free… there are like a million different ways of eating being shoved in our faces every day and they all seem to work! But it just goes to show there is no one right way of eating, and that’s what keeps me from going crazy with comparing myself to others.
One thing that I know works for me is carbs. I gotta have them, otherwise I just don’t feel satisfied after a meal. I constantly see pictures of dinners consisting of chicken and a crap ton of vegetables on blogs, but I know that couldn’t work for me – I would be pawing around in my freezer looking for some bread immediately after!
Oh girl, I’m definitely right there with you on the carbs thing. I know people say protein and fat is the key to a satisfying meal, but there’s no way I’ll be content if I don’t have a heaping pile of grains on my plate.
I think it’s easy to compare, but I know that I am SO different from everyone else so I don’t do it. I don’t think there is anything wrong with trying different things to see what works for you, but you shouldn’t do something just because someone else is! I am constantly trying new things to see what works for me, but I don’t compare anymore. It’s silly 🙂 I LOVEEEE cherries and bluerberries right now. Strawberries are really awesome here, too!
No shame in eats that resemble those of a 5 year-old! I know that feeling all too well 🙂 haha
I totally used to compare myself to bloggers when I first got in to HLBs. I started forcing myself to eat oatmeal (which doesn’t taste great to me and frankly doesn’t fill me up that well) and tried putting chia seeds on everything…until I realized the way I ate was perfectly fine for me. I eat healthy, even if I’m not adding superfoods to everything (no spinach in my smoothies, thanks…my blender’s not high-quality enough to actually ensure you don’t get big chunks of leaves haha)
What works for me: lots of fat (nuts, nut butters, cheese, etc.), lots of Greek yogurt, tons of fresh produce
I’m not someone who grew up eating chips (my family was very healthy) so I never really got in the habit of buying them. That being said, I do like bbq chips, especially Miss Vickie’s or the Kettle brand
I still remember first getting into HLB’s and adding a whole bunch of superfoods and strange powders to my diet as well… Looking back now, I have no idea what I was thinking since there was nothing really wrong with my diet to begin with. Ahh well… live and learn.
“And I promise to keep reminding myself of that if you do too.”
Can I remind you that you’re beautiful AND amazing? And your posts always hit close to home.
Also your Wednesday eats looks amazing. Mmm’ I’m loving summer fruit season 🙂
Guilty as charged for comparing my food to others! I think blog reading can be a great thing, especially for inspiration, but when the comparing thing starts happening, that’s when I know it’s time to take a step back and realize that everyone is different, so different ways of eating work for each of us. I’ve definitely fallen for the paleo thing, and it’s hard to tune all that out when there’s so many positive testimonials out there. But I do know that cutting grains out completely doesn’t do anything for me, so I’m reintroducing some of my favorite pseudo grains like buckwheat and quinoa because I feel more energized with them and being a paleo vegan is basically impossible. I also know that real foods work for me and at this point in my life, I really have no desire for things I used to eat as a kid, but for me, eating real foods doesn’t mean I have to miss out on indulgences, I can just remake them! And of course, dark chocolate is a daily occurrence 😉
Ummm KETCHUP flavored Popchips? What have I been doing with my life?? I need to try those!
comparing is a trap I fall into far too often. I have to say the first thing I will enjoy is popchips after the whole 30 is done. Lovely pop chips
I hate that pressure of comparison… it takes all the fun out of what should be an enjoyable shared experience… and I appreciate that you are calling light to it.
On the lighter side I’m not a flavored chips girl (though I can eat my weight in french onion dip!) and I know a mug of fresh lemon ginger tea will soothe even my most upset stomach when I’m having a bad day 🙂
uggh the comparison trap…I seem to be constantly stuck in it! Whenever I start feeling insecure about my body, I start paying more attention to others’ bodies, and then what they eat, which really just…facilitates the cycle. Ugh. But you’re right, the more I look around, the more I see how different everyone really eats! My best friend and former roommate has a great body, and she eats like a teenage boy. The girl can finish a double cheeseburger in about two minutes flat. Another best friend, who also looks great, eats egg beaters, chicken sausage, and greek yogurt….and that’s pretty much it. I’ve got friends on the paleo diet, friends who are vegan…..there’s no one right way to do it. And for the record – I kind of love the way you eat! delicious, intuitive, and……dry capps, YESSSS.
I’ve definitely been caught in that cycle before too. It’s like, whenever we feel bad about ourselves, we start looking at what works for OTHERS as a way to help ourselves, which is really kind of like taking medication that’s been prescribed for someone else to treat our own ailments… Not usually a good idea.
True that, sista! And yes there are days when I’m feeling frumpy and not so thankful for the way I am~And when I see someone eating this or that, doing this or that, I start to think that I should do the same. Fortunately I go back to being my real self! And I think it’s so awesome you’re finally content with where you’re at!!
I like to convince myself I don’t get caught in the comparison trap, but in reality I do sometimes without even noticing. It is easy to make observations of other people and apply it to ourselves, it is such a fine line between harmless improvement and comparison. Love the reminder about forgiving ourselves!
another first time comment, i just had to express my thanks for yesterday post . it helps to know that so many people feel the same and that i am not going mad if you ever come to london say hi
comparison.. it robs us. Robs us of truly ACCEPTING and EMBRACING our needs and ourselves. thank you. wise words my friend.
p.s.
I need use the word bananafied. LOL! Love it
I too would like to applaud this post. You have absolutely no idea how much you are not only helping yourself, but helping everyone else. I sometimes struggle with many of the things that you’ve noted, and it’s certainly reassuring to know that I’m not in it alone. Stay strong, Amanda. You truly are a beautiful person both inside and out!
Andddd…you’re done it yet again. My mind, your words. I can definitely fall into the comparison trap, and have drastically scaled back on my blog reading since February. I am less anxious, and just happier when I don’t read tons of blogs everyday. If I stick to you, Sam’s blog, and a few others I feel inspired and supported. Thanks for being the voice of reason, once again!
It takes a lot of strength to be able to be able to walk away from the things that we know are a negative influence on us. I remember having to take a step back for a while as well, and I hope that it helps you like it helped me 🙂